Re: Unguarded conduits--The unheralded hero of scifi adventure!

"John Schilling" <schillin@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote in message 
news:8htgp3dfjn1vsnf33govfiuubrhq6htksm@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> On Tue, 22 Jan 2008 07:11:14 -0800 (PST), Tom <drsoong@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote:
>
>>On Jan 22, 6:38 am, "Ken from Chicago" <kwicker1b_nos...@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
>
>>wrote:
>>> Time and again, in Star Trek, Stargate, Farscape, Terminator, Aliens, 
>>> etc.,
>>> the unguarded and unmonitored hallway, the unlocked person-sized air 
>>> vents,
>>> the huge sewer pipes ... if you need to break in, surveil and / or
break 
>>> out
>>> of a place you need the
>
>>> UNGUARDED CONDUIT.
>
>>> Now, it's a staple of nongenre shows, movies and stories, but you'd 
>>> think in
>>> scifi you could space some extra minions, robots, psionic sensors,
even 
>>> a
>>> couple of webcams to guard or at least monitor.
>
>>> And with Unguarded Conduit is trusty sidekick:
>
>>> Slow Noisy Distracted Guards.
>
>>> Our heroes are sneaking into a some super secret ultra lair, the 
>>> Archvillain
>>> once in a blue moon actually DOES have guards, but is undone by said 
>>> guards:
>>> --taking forever to patrol an area,
>>> --making enough noise to alert anyone sneaking about from miles away,
>>> --and even when said guards get the drop on the sneaks lurking about, 
>>> the
>>> guards are too distracted by their own conversation or a radio or tv
or 
>>> some
>>> magazine or picture book to take notice.
>
>>> -- Ken from Chicago
>
>>That's a problem I've always had with Stargate SG-1... the team
>>wanders around Go'auld (sp?) mother ****ps like they own them.
>
> As a general rule, the best way to not get caught in a place you
> aren't allowed to be[1], is to walk around like you own the place.
> This works way, way, way better than lurking in the shadows or
> crawling through air ducts or anything like that.  That makes you
> look guilty.  Walking around like you own the place, makes you look
> like you own the place - and nobody wants to mess with the boss[2]

Worked for (ex-) agent Michael Westen. Carrying an open container of
yogurt 
(or a drink) really sells it.

> It does help if you dress like the people who actually do own the
> place, which is sometimes an issue for SG-1, but it isn't essential.

How often do SG1 or even SGA go undercover?

> The other best way to not get caught, is to walk around like you're
> the janitor and/or a very busy secretary.  Pragmatically speaking,
> this often overlaps with Plan A, above.  And again, it helps if you
> dress the part.

What janitor?

>>The guards always travel in packs. Why not separate and cover more
>>areas of the ****p?
>
> Because "guard" is a very boring job, the tedium of which is best
> alleviated by hanging out chatting with your fellow guards.  And
> because covering more areas of the ****p, just means more op****tunity
> to get into trouble by, e.g., inadvertently messing with the boss's
> boss who wasn't where he was supposed to be.

Wifi headset communicators.

> The best way to get through a day as a security guard, is to hang
> out with your fellow security guards at your post on the perimeter
> or in the control room, not looking for trouble and going out on
> patrol only when absolutely required.

UNGUARDED CONDUIT strikes again!

> [1] Aside from not being there in the first place, of course.
>
> [2] Or the boss's boss, or the visiting VIP, or whatever.
>
>
> -- 
> *John Schilling                    * "Anything worth doing,         *
> *Member:AIAA,NRA,ACLU,SAS,LP       *  is worth doing for money"     *
> *Chief Scientist & General Partner *    -13th Rule of Acquisition   *
> *White Elephant Research, LLC      * "There is no substitute        *
> *John.Schilling@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
     *  for success"                  *
> *661-951-9107 or 661-275-6795      *    -58th Rule of Acquisition   *

-- Ken from Chicago